Thursday, April 10, 2008

Exclusive: Chinese Guy Who Keeps Putting Lead In Everything, Finally Caught

Above: Fu Kiu finally caught!

The man responsible for lead in products imported from China, everything from childrens toys to lunch boxes, has finally been aprehended. Asked why he did it, he said, "Because I have lots of lead."

It was revealed, that Fu Kiu met with the heads of Chinese sweat shops, and talked them into adding lead to everything. He said it would "make their products better"...and he "had lots of lead." No one knows why they listened to him.

Fu Kiu recently started a campaign with these sweatshops to add antifreeze in toothpaste. He told them that your "teeth wouldn't freeze in the winter." No one knows why they listened to him for that, either.

Before his apprehension, Fu Kiu was last seen lacing marijuana with lead. Upon his arrest, Fu Kiu stated that he still has lots of lead.

Further, he stated, "Fu Kiu want to be like big American businessman and make lots of money selling crap like lead."
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